Hi everyone!

For today’s blog, I’d like to share a book which I’ve been using to help my daughter with her interactions with friends. Caitlin has an easy time making friends, but sometimes understanding others’ social cues can be a problem.

For more information on how ADD can affect our children’s understanding of verbal and nonverbal speech, check out this excellent article by ADDitude Magazine.

The book I’m using with my daughter to help her navigate her way is Natasha Daniels' Social Skills Activities for Kids: 50 Fun Exercises for Making Friends, Talking and Listening, and Understanding Social Rules. Whew! That’s a long title. But it perfectly encapsulates how this book can catch and hold your child’s attention.

First, it’s a workbook. Inside, children can read stories, perform activities, and engage in role play. The pages are colorful and fun so that children feel engaged and excited.

Second, it’s full of bright pictures of children who look just like my daughter – sometimes they’re happy and having fun and other times they may be alone and frustrated. I think that Caitlin enjoys the book because she sees herself on every page.

I was first alerted to Social Skills Activities by a friend of mine whose son also has ADD. In her case, she used some of the book’s scenarios to engage the whole family in role play. In our family, we’ve been taking the book out at bedtime. We’ve found that it serves as a relaxing and positive way to end the day.

Sharing this book makes me wonder: what books have you read or used that have helped you navigate your child’s ADD? I’d love to hear about them! Leave your ideas in the comments here or post a review on our Facebook or Instagram pages.

We can help our children through this, one day – and one page – at a time.

Last Thursday after school, my daughter Caitlin asked me if we could go to the playground. This was a stark departure from her usual pattern of decompressing from school by wanting to play on her tablet. But here's the thing: Caitlin didn't just want to go to the playground to play; she wanted to bring garbage bags so that we could clean up the park.

"I want to do something nice for the squirrels," she said.

It turns out that Caitlin's teacher had been encouraging her class to practice random acts of kindness. That day, they had written nice notes to the principal telling her what they liked about their school. When they delivered their notes, the children were encouraged by their principal's genuine surprise and gratitude. They had caught the kindness bug.

Caitlin has seemed a little bit happier and more energetic in these past few days. We've been talking a lot about other ways we can show people (and animals) kindness, and I'm finding that her ADHD-related anger has been put on hold.

So let's try it! Let's all encourage our kids to reach out to their family, friends, and community members to show how kind we can be. Because kindness isn't only rewarding - it's contagious!

​How can you pass on some kindness today?

​I want you to know that you’re not alone.

If there’s one thing that parents of kids with ADHD tell us over and over it’s this: “I feel guilty.” But let’s look that guilt in the eye and tell it to stand down. You’re not welcome here, Guilt. And you’re certainly not warranted.

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder is no one’s fault. It’s not your fault. It’s not your child’s fault. But it is hard. Right? Because it’s hard to be a kid with ADHD. And it’s hard to parent that ADHD child. But here’s the thing: you’re not alone.

ADHD children are bright and creative, and they care deeply about their chosen interests. Many of you answered our October call to post videos of your children doing something they love. Those videos were so inspiring! If you haven’t seen them, I encourage you to check them out on our Facebook and Instagram pages.

But the challenges our children face with their non-neurotypical behaviors can test our resolve and take us down even on our best days. It might not be pleasant, but it is normal. So let’s stand up to guilt and recognize ourselves and our children for what we are: human.

There’s a great article in the most recent copy of ADDitude Magazine that speaks directly to this idea of unwanted guilt. I’m posting a link to the article here and I encourage you all to read it once, and then twice, and then whenever you feel the need.
We’re all in this together, and our shared experiences will make us stronger. Leave a comment below with your thoughts on the article or reach out to us in the office if you’d like to chat. 

On these crisp, fall mornings, I like to take an hour to myself after the kids get off to school and just read and enjoy a cup of coffee. During my reading this morning, I came across a quote which I thought was especially poignant for our ADHD kiddos. It’s a quote from Albert Einstein and it goes like this:

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

My daughter Caitlin is this fish. She doesn’t always stay focused or self-soothe or abide by others’ social cues. But that’s not because she’s not good enough; she’s just sometimes in the wrong element.

When things get tough for Caitlin, we’ve found that her creative side can be her best partner. We can go from tantrum to smiles in less than five minutes if we’re able to give her art supplies like her favorite markers and a sketch pad. Art puts Caitlin back in her water.

What can you do to put your child back in their water?

And let’s not forget about inspiring our kids! I’ve pulled a few of my favorite Dr. Seuss quotes for you to share with your family. I hope that they will offer inspiration for your children when they need it the most!
​
My favorites by Dr. Seuss

• You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
• You’re off to Great Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, so…get on your way!
• Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.
• Why fit in when you were born to stand out?

And finally…

• Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!

Have a great day, everyone!
 

Happy Halloween everyone! We’re having beautiful, clear weather here in southwest Washington and tonight should be a perfect night to get the kids out for some trick-or-treating fun.

Some of you may have participated in Camas’s annual Boo Bash last week. We saw so many great costumes! As happens every year, local business owners donned festive costumes and stood outside of their downtown Camas shops, handing out candy to a steady parade of Camas children. So fun! On Saturday, Camas mayor Shannon Turk announced that participation at this year’s event outpaced that of both 2017 and 2018.

Check out more local events happening in southwest Washington tonight.

If your children are like mine, they’ll rush out of school this afternoon ready to hit the trick-or-treating trail. But let’s take some time to pause and make sure our children are well-prepared.

My ADHD daughter needs to trick-or-treat one-on-one with a parent; large groups of bustling children are not for her. Also, she tends to be more sensitive to loud Halloween displays and particularly frightening costumes. Her style is to head out early, make her appearances, and then come home to help me hand out candy until bedtime (those teenagers come late!).

Here are some good tips for everyone to remember on Halloween night:

1. Always walk on the sidewalks;
2. Cross streets at designated crosswalks;
3. Be attentive for drivers who may not see you in the dark; and
4. Carry flashlights or glow sticks to aid with visibility.

While most of our neighbors in southwest Washington live in close-knit communities where everyone looks out for one another, it’s still a good idea for parents to check their children’s candy for any dangerous objects or open wrappers.

So let's have fun tonight and stay safe! Also, we’d love to see your pictures on our Facebook and Instagram pages. Join us in posting your pictures with the hashtags #Halloween2019, #SWWA, #ADDtributes, and #TrickorTreat.

Have fun!

A few evenings ago, I was checking messages on my phone. After sending my last message, it occurred to me that although our whole family was together in the same room, it was unusually quiet. I looked up and that’s when I saw them: The Devices.
My husband was on his laptop. My kids were on their tablets. And I, of course, was on my phone. Were we becoming that family?

Our evenings weren’t always this way. In fact, right up until last Christmas, it was never this way. We used to play cards or board games at night. We’d read stories, play with Legos, or bake a dessert. When our kids were on screens, it was because we would let them play on our phones for just 45 minutes a day.

And then came Christmas.

Our ten-year-old, Joshua, had been asking for a gaming system for two years. When he first started asking, he told us that many of his eight-year-old peers had video games at home and that it wasn’t fair that we were different. We listened, but we stood our ground. No electronics.

But just before Christmas Joshua told us some news. He said that he was sitting alone at lunch, not talking to anyone else. Lunch made him sad, he said, because all his friends were talking about video games and he had nothing to share. We felt guilty about his loneliness and decided to rethink our stance.

We started by researching various tablets and related apps. We were looking for ways that our children could play games without talking to or playing with people online. We thought that with the right settings and supervision, we could live with giving our kids Kindle tablets.

So our kids had a great Christmas! But every day since, we’ve limited their screen time to no more than one hour per day. For my daughter Caitlin – who last year received an ADHD diagnosis - I feel this is especially important.
 
ABC news recently reported on a study out of the University of Alberta. The study’s results showed that “by the age of 5, children who spent two hours or more looking at a screen each day were 7.7 times more likely to meet the criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD when compared to children who spent 30 minutes or less each day on a screen.”

So we’ve limited our kids’ screen time, and we closely monitor all of their games and activities. When they’re using their tablets, we like to draw their attention to elements which promote learning, such as the PBS Kids app, Kindle books, or audio books.
This method seems to work for us: our kids are able to play on electronics, and as parents, we’re still able to ensure that our kids play within their limits.

And Caitlin? She seems more interested in the lulling aspects of an audio book or drawing program. She’s able to use her device to calm her down and help her regroup before setting off her next big adventure.

​Today I’d like to jump right in and answer some of the most commonly asked questions we receive here at ADDtributes. Please keep sending us your questions! We’re here to help.
 
Q: What are some symptoms of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)?
A: ADHD can manifest differently in different kids, but some common traits are hyperactivity, impulsivity, non-age-appropriate behavior, or difficulty paying attention. In addition, kids with ADHD may have trouble with memory or organization, or they may become easily frustrated or angry.
 
Q: Who can diagnose my child?
A: If you think your child may be struggling with ADHD, you can ask a pediatric psychiatrist for an evaluation. Other providers who may be able to diagnose your child include: pediatricians, family doctors, psychologists or neurologists.
 
Q: My husband has ADHD. Could our children be at risk?
A: While not all children of parents with ADHD inherit the disorder, it can run in families. If you feel that your child is demonstrating ADHD-like behavior, it is best to see a medical professional for a diagnosis. Be sure to tell your provider about any family history of ADHD.
 
Q: How will ADHD affect my child at school?
A: You may find that your child has a hard time focusing on academic assignments or that they are demonstrating behavior that isn’t age- or classroom- appropriate. If you have received an ADHD diagnosis, Washington state schools offer programs and plans to assist your child while at school. Ask your child’s teacher about how to get your child a 504 Plan or an Individualized Education Program plan (IEP).
 
For more frequently asked questions about the disorder and how it manifests in different children, please visit The Brain and Behavior Research Foundation’s website here.